Your client is not your employer
I’ve said this statement to at least two clients in the past week.
It’s not the first time I’ve said this, nor will it be the last.
I first ran into this, as a new business owner, because it’s very common for this to show up when you’re building a business. You’re still feeling things out, wanting to take on as many clients as you can, wanting to be available for people, etc.
But lately, I’ve been seeing this with #womenentrepreneurs who have steady businesses. Businesses that are doing well. So why is this coming up?
My hypothesis is the dynamics change when you offer a retainer services, because it’s a longer term working engagement. The longer engagements lead to deeper working relationships, which can also lead to lessening of boundaries. My theory is this happens for two reasons.
One, as a service provider, in general, the line between client and employer can easily blur because the work is done for someone else. The clients may start to lean on the service provider to provide more and more work, or more value, the longer they work together. They may expect quicker turnarounds. Ask for things outside of scope, etc. As a #businessowner it’s easy to slip into this mode of putting their needs above your own.
Two, is all about money. There’s a fundamental difference in the cadence of getting paid when you work for an employer and have a steady paycheck, and when you work for yourself. In the latter situation, you might have a great Spring and Summer and a slow January. You still make the same annual income you were at your 9-5 job, but not necessarily the same monthly income.
Example: Person A and Person B each make an annual income of $90,000. B works for herself, and may make $0 January - June, and then makes $90K in the second half of the year. Whereas A, makes $7,500 a month January - December.
For many of us, it's ingrained to have a ‘steady paycheck.’ It's a significant change to get used to cycles of making money that can show up as an entrepreneur. When you take on a retainer client, it mimics the "safety" you had with consistent paychecks. When the lines begin to blur, and you feel at the mercy of them, scarcity and lack show up. There's fear of rocking the boat with the client, and losing the steady income.
An engagement that may have started with firm boundaries in place, now a (frankly) f*cked situation.
If you’ve found yourself in this position, please know: it’s very common, and it has nothing to do with your talents or ability to run a successful business. It’s also not a deficiency in anything you’ve done or are doing. This is a boundary issue.
Simple in description, sometimes difficult to execute. Learning to set and maintain boundaries will make a world of difference in the ease of running your business.
In the cases of my two clients, I said the same things:
They are your client, not your employer. You can resign them as easily as they can resign you.
This is your business. Businesses make money. You are allowed to make money, as much as you want. I guarantee, this client is only worrying about their ability to make money - not yours.
How would a man, or a male CEO, approach this situation?
The last point sucks, but it’s valid. We’re still in a very male-dominated business culture, and there are statistics to back up all the different ways men show up vs women. When boundary issues show up, and the first two points don’t resonate, it’s a good exercise to ask this question. I know, because I've asked it of myself.
What do you think? Have you run into the situation of blurred lines with a client? Did you have a retainer with them? I’d love to know!